Quarter Down

In 2 days, my first quarter as a teacher will be officially over. I am not sure what I should feel right now. Relief, excitement, nervousness, etc. I feel like everyday I am on a ride of emotions, the emotions of middle school students. Some hours they are up some down, some times they just do not want to see or hear me the rest of the day. 

It takes a special person to deal with everything that happens every day. In relation to my last post, I am not sure where the last year has gone even. Last year at this time I was in relatively the same place. Off from school due to a Halloween storm. Stressed every day over, and excited for the upcoming holidays.

But it is hard to understand some things I have come across in quarter 1. I wish I could show all my kids the future and what it could hold for some of them. I want them all to be excited for High School, College, and beyond. I want them to realize that even if High School doesn't care about their 8th grade grades, that it might actually make their life easier in the future. I wish I also knew how to make a lesson that every person likes. Yes there are ones where most of them like it but it is a pretty challenging job to accomplish day in and day out. 

As I sit here on this gloomy day, I realize that overall I think I am having that overall feeling after quarter 1. I think about how much I put into each day and how little I seem to get on the outside. It is a rough time to be a first year teacher. There is a lot swirling around about teachers. About how we have it easy, and we complain about all this stuff. I think the main reason we complain is because we want the best for our students and sometimes it just doesn't seem that both of us want the same thing. 

I am so emotional sometimes about my job, which was something I never had before. But now it is a whole new ballpark. I am a teacher through and through. I just have to still try to find ways to balance everything in my life. I can't get myself so worked up with school things when I can not control every aspect of it. I want to, just not fully possible. 

So here is to another good quarter of lots of learning and lots of hopefully exciting moments along the ride. 

Time

Wow, it has been a long time since I was on here last to write a post. It isn't that I haven't wanted to, it is just that the most precious gift we have in life has been short lately. If you haven't guessed what that gift is, it is time.

Time is something we take for granted, we wish we had more of, and we waste a lot of it over a lifetime. We all wish we had more of it, whether it be because work takes up too much time, we aren't getting enough sleep, and we just can't get everything done in the day we want to.

What really changed about how time seems to drag at some times and goes super fast at other? For me, time right after my father passed, it dragged and I just felt each minute that I was now without my father. Now, as I start my new career as a teacher, I feel that I don't have know if I can ever get everything done in a single day that I want to do.

I wish I knew a way to really use my time the best I can. I try to here and there, whether it be waking up and getting to school a little before when I actually need to be or it is grading some papers while having a football game on that I am not following too closely, but we cannot always combine items when our attention needs to be fully on one of the tasks. The worst is when you sit in traffic for 30 minutes and feel that you have just wasted some precious time that you were going to use somewhere else.

In the lifestyle of on the go and trying to do as much as possible, I feel wasted time is the worst thing you could do, but when I am completely trained from my first 3 weeks of work and I sit here on my day off not doing too much, I feel that it really isn't wasted time, it is time to actually recover and relax from the overworked time of the last couple of weeks. I think that each of us knows the best way to enjoy and sue the time we are given, because we are not sure when our time will be cut short from anything: from a relationship, from a career, from a sport, or from a loved one. You want to be able to say on the other end of your time in something that you used it the best you could. I can see that I did with my past career, that I did with my time in college, and that I did with my relationship with my father.

I know that I always will think I wanted more time, but I can be happy and enjoy the time I did share with him. We did a lot, we shared a lot of memories and yes he could have been here for more things in life, but I am just happy I had 26 glorious years with him. I hope to have 26 more years of other times in my life t hat keep me sane: friends, sports, etc.

No matter what you have each day that take up part of your time, just remember that you do always need something to have to relax with and you might think it is wasting time but I also think we all need a little time just to ourselves. Reflection and relaxation are incredibly important parts of our life, and our time wouldn't be as good in between without those times.

So as we start this fall season, and we get closer to the hectic holiday season, remember that time is sometime you can give and receive. Spend a little more time on yourself if you have been neglecting it, or spend some time with someone you have maybe forgotten about for awhile. You never know what it can do for your life :)

Unknown

What is the unknown? Is it just something that is not researched enough or more or less just something that we do not understand? I feel like it is sometimes a little bit of both. Depending on the situation, it can go back and forth... something that you do not really understand as an individual or just a new concept.

There are always unkowns. Whether it be an ailment that it is confusing to you, a wonder about future plans, or even what will happen in the Olympics that day. Unknowns are not something people relish well. As humans, we do not enjoy when we do not have control, or do not really truly understand what is going on in our life. There is something about how our mind can wander when we do not know for certain what is going on. When you do not know what is making you sick, people go through many different variables and hypothesis of what could be wrong. Does that make you feel better ever? Thinking you might have some random virus or infection... usually not. Most people try to put it out of their mind, but usually do not feel fully better until an expert, or in this case a doctor, tells you what exactly is going on. The moment the unknown, becomes a known.

I have gone through unknowns these last couple months. How would I cope without a father anymore, will I ever find a job that fits for me in this new career change, will I be safe and healthy until I can get on benefits again? These are all scary questions that can really just take you to a dark place. It is not fun there, because it is an unknown. Each day though, you must try to continue to look at things little by little, and not try to become overwhelmed with things. If you can take things one day at a time, and let some pieces fall into place then things are not just unknown but the unexpected future, which sounds a heck of a lot better.

As a world, we like control.. we like to know things before they happen. But we cannot predict things in our lives, we can not always read the end of a book before we start it... sometimes you have to go with the punches. In those situations, sometimes unknowns are good. It is like a little bit of a puzzle but fun maze that has to come to full picture. I don't want to know everything that is going to happen in my life. Would that be fun for people? To know, oh tomorrow I am going to get the flu. I mean you might try to change it, but I doubt it will actually be something you can change.

This summer, I wish I felt differently, that I could just know where the next month would take me. It would just be a relief after months of uncertantity. But that is what gives life a little flavor. Not everything can be a walk in the park, if it was we would all get bored after awhile. No, there is times when the known is better... on tests, on diagnoses, in love, and in your heart... but not everything is black and white. Unknown things in our life are opportunities.. to shine, to reach for something new, to learn. We are all looking for those type of things in our life. Sadly though, that is not the course everything takes.

In all, just try to think that the unknown is not always scary. Yes, it is different and it is that way because we are not sure what it brings. But try to think back to a time when you did not know something and then found out and how awesome it might have made you feel. Sometimes the unknown just falls into being patient. Which is something else that is entirely hard, but can be very rewarding. August, I am not sure what you will bring but I will try to stay as positive about the unknown as I can be. :)

Olympics

Every four years, a lovely two weeks of amazing sporting events begins. As a kid growing up, those summers were some of my favorite. Watching the next great athlete show the world what they were made of, all of the upsets, and the agonizing moments of defeat were just another part of my life that made me who I am today. I am incredibly competitive and sadly I wish I was able to take my competition to the levels of the Olympic games.

This year I thought I would be there. Not as an athlete, but as a spectator. But sometimes things do not always work out the way you want. I had applied for tickets and everything, and if you ever want to to go to the Olympics, make sure you plan early. But there were circumstances that left me unable to attend the games across the Pond.

The Olympics are mesmorizing. It is this amazing time for athletes to showcase all of their hard work and compete at some of the highest levels in their individual sport. You also get to watch sports that you might never hear about or see any other time. Today I got to watch Archery, which seems really difficult but at the same time I did not see the athletes showing any sign of them letting the stage get to them.

Each night, I find myself just glued to the newest headline or what will be the talk of the World the next day. It is not all about the sports, because people who do not really like sports can get into the Olympics too. It is about the experiences and the atmosphere. I can imagine, that there is nothing like that.

The Olympics are on my Bucket List. And I will get to one sometime soon, I just wish that it could have been this year though. I am excited to start watching Gymnastics tonight. Rowing brings me back to my college years. Swimming has been my favorite though since I was little and continues to be. But everything is exciting to watch, even if it is something I can see during the rest of the year.

So here is to two weeks of Magic. Two weeks of exciting times where everyone forgets the tensions between countries, politics is not a worry, or financial turnmoil. It is a time for passion, enthusiasm, and wonder. Enjoy them everyone, because like everything else, they are gone too fast!

Oh and Go Team USA!!

Tough Mountain

I love competition, which can come in all sorts of forms. Over the winter, while looking at things to do this summer, I found a Tough Mudder type of race called the Tough Mountain. It was being held at Sunday River Ski Resort in Maine and would take the 5K and obstacles of a Tough Mudder Race and put it on a ski mountain, to add a little flare.

You would think, running up hills, going through mud pits, getting hit with snow guns as you run up a hill... exactly what I want to do.. right? Well obviously I did so Rich and I completed in last weekend. When we got there, we did not know really what to expect. As we pulled up, we were looking at the ski trails to see if we saw anything that let us know how high we were going to be going. Heats started at 10 AM and we were supposed to go in the 11:30 heat, so we had some time to look around and see what was going on.

After we got our Bibs and then our numbers written on our arm and leg, I felt like I was in a triathlon or something. We walked out to the starting area and were taken away. Hundreds of people were hanging around, with a DJ playing, and an announcer who is letting us know what is going on. It almost kind of got me pumped up like some old Swimming or Rowing days. I was ready to get going even though it was not my heat time yet.

When Rich and I were ready to get going, we had decided we would run together and just enjoy the whole experience. As the announcer counted down the last 10 seconds before we went, it was just pure adrenaline.. and hoping to not get hurt. Haha. The 3.1 miles and 16 obstacles were all that was between me and partying afterwards.

It didn't take us long to get our feet wet, literally. Obstacle 1 was going through like a water mud pit within the first 30 seconds of the race. Then we continued up and up while snow guns blasted on us. If you thought skiing through those things is bad, try going through it running, it is pretty unbearable. We kept going up and up, and then had to walk across some pipes over a pond of muddy water. Good thing I could keep my balance, at least for a little bit of time. From there we did get to run down a big but then crawl under a long area of muddy barb wire. Lets say that, ponytails are not something that help girls get through there easily. Finally on the other side, I had a good number of battle scars already. We weren't even half way done yet.

From there, it was a lot of going up with some smaller obstacles in the way. The last obstacle up was called WTF and it was pretty much running, if you could run, up the steep part of a ski lift area. There was a rope to help if you needed it, but it was pretty much a climbing on all four just hoping to not slip and slide down the amount you have already worked your way up. At the top, there was music playing and it felt like an accomplishment thinking, alright it is just going downhill from now on.

Downhill was actually worse at times since there was a lot of watery, muddy grass that was slippery and it seemed like you had to slow yourself down all the time to make it down safely. One of the obstacles I was looking forward to the most was called the leap frog... going across a pond on little lilly pads that they had made. Sadly when we got there, they had informed us it was partially broken so we were not able to do the whole obstacle. All I know, is it better be there next year too. Then we were almost to the end, up and over some walls with a mud pit in between. Needless to say, my feet did get stuck and I lost a shoe but made it through with Rich's help. From there, it was just a last minute slide, literally, down a huge slip and slide to the finish line.

It was a great time, we finished with a decent time of 1 hour 6 minutes. Not winning, but we were in the first 1/3 of people, which isn't bad for over 1000 participants. More people should def. do it next year with us. It is pretty much a great workout and awesome time. We enjoyed the next couple of hours watching other heats, having some food and some brews and just enjoying the amazing weather and time together. Here are some photos of other heats and some of the obstacles. Enjoy!

Cheers to being done

Welcome to the snow guns

Getting down and dirty

Starting off nice and wet

Slipping and sliding to victory

What a beautiful day

Yes.. yes it is

Wedding Season

So the last couple of years... my summers have been over run by weddings. It is insane! At least 3 or 4 weekends a summer are spent watching another friend tie the knot. I love weddings and by no means hate having to go to them, it is just it has become kind of a game to see what year we break the record for weddings in a summer.

This summer we have 4, and luckily they are spread out a good amount. The thing I love about weddings, other then having a good time, is just really seeing a lot of hard word pay off for two special people in your life and watching them begin this new chapter together.

The first one of this year is one of Rich's old college roommates. It was a lot of good college friends and it was a great day for a wedding. The groom is in a band so even came up and performed at his own wedding for a couple songs! We all had a great time and I know Jim and Liz did!

Weddings do make you realize one thing... you are getting older and more mature (hopefully). They show you that you are starting a new chapter, this life not as a child, college student, single college graduate, but now you are married... part of a pair.. life partners. It is touching!

As much fun as we have at weddings, you know that for everything that goes well, it took a lot of planning! And as each wedding I go to, I see more and more amazing things that I would never have thought of at a wedding.

With one down, three to go. Hopefully each continue to have a great day and start this amazing new journey together!

Getting ready to say their vows

You may now kiss the bride!

Just relaxing before the reception

There goes the wedding party

Let the dancing begin

And let the new band take over :)

Mt. Washington

It has been a bad summer for me and blogging. Between job searching, trips, work, and all the weekends being filled with planned activities... finding time to blog has been hard. I am also simply at a loss for words right now to write about. It has been an emotional summer and I feel almost drained of a lot of my more inspirational words. So for now, I will highlight points of my summer that have been good.

July 1 a group of us went up to hike Mt Washington. Bennett, Rich, and I had done it two years ago and made it in record time. It was a sunny say, which is very very RARE at Mt. Washington so we did not really know what to expect this time. This year we added Greg and Laurie to the trip and decided to head up the mountain from a different side.

During the morning we had comfortable weather with great views and enjoyed some of the sights. There were beautiful waterfalls and just plenty of pretty photo opportunities.

We got to the Lake of the Clouds and felt we were getting there. We were in the Alpine zone, and we finally were out of tree cover. The clouds were rolling in, so it became harder to see at the top but after about 4 hours we finally made the last couple of steps to the summit.

Then it became the trek down. Now as hard as you might think going up a big mountain is, sometimes coming down is even harder. You must stop your self from just trying to continue moving down and down. Watching each step, it is challenging. But about 20 minutes into our descent, we felt the beginning of rain. Now earlier in the year Rich and I had already been stuck in a storm on a hike and I was not excited to have this for a 3 hour trip down. Luckily we all had items prepared to wear if we encountered some rain.

After about 30 minutes of pretty bad rain and no real thunder, the rain started to clear. Good thing it got warm again and we were able to dry out most of the way down. Towards the bottom we did have some thunder but it seemed distant enough that we weren't too worried and we were pretty low at that point.

Once again, I realized how beautiful the mountains on NH and VT are. It doesn't matter how in shape I am, it always sees to take a lot out of me as well. Everyone should get up to the Presidential Range in the White Mountains. They are gorgeous and I hope over the next couple of years to get some of the other peaks done.

The group before we got going

One of our first water sightings

Bennett looking for his inner zen

Water fall, but higher up

Don't push him in

The boys and the fall

Looking out over the Valley

Told you, this was the path to go to see waterfalls

Looking out at the view again.. finally in the alpine zone

The clouds are moving in

Oh man it is going to rain...

Still good thoughts as we make our way down

And it is already clearing up

Hanging out on the bridge, almost there

Back at the bottom

We did it!

Another day, another mountain down :)